The Twin Mom Survival Guide: The First Six Months


Seven survival skills from a twin mom to help adjust to life with two.

It gets better. When I was pregnant, the twin moms I know indoctrinated me into their club by informing me of the twin mantra I would be repeating to myself every day for the first few months. I had no idea what they were talking about because I was happily decorating the nursery, buying adorable baby clothes and going on organizational rampages through the house (the tape on my label maker had to be replaced several times). My biggest concern was if my newly formed cankles would ever go away. Then my husband and I brought little Theo and Gemma home from the hospital, and I called all my twin mom friends and made them remind me of the mantra every day. Because those first few months were crazypants.

Now my babies are six months old and I wanted to share a few things that helped me adapt to my new situation. The last time I had to adapt to a new life this quickly was when I arrived at USC my freshman year from my small town in Virginia. Unfortunately frat parties and jungle juice were not going to get me through twin parenting.

Survival Skill #1: When your babies are both crying at the same time, force yourself to laugh at how ridiculous the situation is as you go back and forth soothing them. Because this will happen and it sucks. The good news is, for me and most of my twin mom friends, you usually have one mellow baby and one feisty baby. This will cut down on the dual meltdowns, although in my case, we had a Freaky Friday situation and the mellow and feisty one switched places around month three. That was slightly confusing, but hey, we were happy one was still mellow.

Survival Skill #2: Invest in two swings. You don’t need two activity mats, you don’t need two Sophie the Giraffes and you definitely don’t need those twenty Aden and Anais swaddle blankets you panicked and registered for at the last minute. But two swings are the gift that keeps on giving. My babies fell asleep in them when they were under three months and now that they’re six months, they immediately relax and play with the mobile part while they’re swinging. Two days ago they were both upset from teething and I put them in the swings with their teether toys and they were smiling within two minutes.

Survival Skill #3: Don’t hang out with singleton moms for at least a month after you give birth. Being a mom is exhausting and challenging for everyone and I’m not taking any part of that away from singleton moms. But for that first month, it’s tough to hear them talk about how hard it is with one baby. That being said, I imagine a mom of triplets would think I’m a complete wuss. But take my advice on this one because in your exhausted state, you don’t want to say something to one of your friends you’ll regret later once you’ve gotten more than two hours of sleep and your filter is back intact.

Survival Skill #4: Do your dark circles a favor and blend YSL Touche Eclat with Benefit Erase Paste all over those swollen bad boys. First put on the Touche Eclat, then the Erase Paste. The combo is unbeatable and I at least looked fifty percent less exhausted than I felt when I finally left the house for my first big grocery store outing.

Survival Skill #5: If someone asks you if they can help, SAY YES! Even if you don’t have a job for them at that exact moment, say yes because you will. Twins are an all hands on deck situation those first few months. I don’t care if this person is a satellite friend you barely know, they said they want to help, so let them!

Survival Skill #6: Learn the art of the double bottle feed (and make sure your husband, boyfriend, partner, etc. does too!). First, you need two of these rocker chairs (obviously there are many options, but I found these to be the best). Then bib up your babies, take a seat in front of them and feed them both at the same time. When you need to burp one baby and the other one is screaming because they want to continue eating, you can prop their bottle up with a few blankets. And like everything else with twins, this gets sooooo much easier as they get older.

Survival Skill #7: Repeat the twin mantra whenever you’re feeling yourself downward spiral. IT GETS BETTER. The first time your babies smile at each other is the coolest thing ever and nothing compares to that moment. Oh, and the other piece of good news – those cankles totally go away.

What are your musts for multiples? Fill us in on your favorites by creating a weeList.

Alyssa Embree Schwartz is a screenwriter and author based in Washington D.C. Her latest YA book series, Georgetown Academy, is out now.

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10 Responses

  1. Abby Heuerman says:

    Great blog!! Erase Paste is my BEST FRIEND, I still laugh with every double meltdown, never say no when someone offers help and still get annoyed when friends of “singletons” try to compare and complain and my twins are 7 months old. Which brings another point… I find it humorous how many times in the past 7 months I have said the word singeltons (a word which was previously not even a part of my vocabulary) and received odd looks. My mantra is “it could be worst. They could be triplets”.

    • Michelle says:

      Yes girl!! I totally felt the same way! Something that would get to me is when people who had two kids(not twins) would come up to you and tell you they know exactly how you feel. Like as in having two kids is the same as having twins. It’s not! Especially when your kids are 6 and 1 and I have(at the time) twin 3 month old boys.

  2. Jessica says:

    Thanks for your time to sharing this. I waiting my baby now, wish I can apply these experiences asap 🙂

  3. Sharon says:

    I wish I saw this before I had my twins!! You’re right – it definitely gets better…especially now that they’re ONE! Thanks!

  4. Jo says:

    Hey! I’m a twin. I always imagine the fun my mom had with us when we were little! Never thought of all the hard work! Now that i think of it I’ll stop hoping for a twin of my own! Check out our latest blog about being twins.

  5. Taty says:

    Nice blog! I was looking for something useful, fun and refreshing. I got takeaway points minus the drama. Good luck with your kiddos!

  6. This is a great, thought provoking read Megan. I totally agree that parents, and the world, would benefit by us all showing more compassion!

  7. Sofie says:

    Great article. I’ve been looking around for great twin vlogs as well and found this one. It’s a youtube vlogger who announces to her parents she is pregnant. It’s a great video and their reaction is amazing. The vlogger also has twins.

  8. Jayda Ivy says:

    This is so true! I remember reading this when I was pregnant with my boys and they’re 4 months now and all of this is so accurate. I have one feisty & one mellow one too!

  9. Michelle says:

    I feel bad for saying it, but when I first had my twins I had to stay awake from social media for awhile. The reason being, I had other friends who were Prego and had their babies around the same time as me and when you see them kind of complaining about how hard those first few months are and how tired they are, it would almost annoy me because I’m over here handling two by myself and working a full time job yet I’m not complaining about how little sleep I’m running on or how exhausted I am. So it was better for me to just stay away from social media.

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